Sybil Glory DeFord
January 31, 1973 - February 21, 2005
Obituary
Sybil Glory DeFord
February 31, 1973 to February 22, 2005
Sybil was known for her amazing love of life and a kind of crazy, wonderful vital energy that that infected everyone she encountered. She was the kind of person that had total strangers come up to her and want to touch her for a moment just to ”get what she had.” Being a Mystic, she had an ever-present sense of the divine presence within her, and that presence was her constant companion, mentor, comforter, and friend. While she did not often speak about this aspect of her self, she did strongly affect others just by being who she was. Her many friends all talk of how she was an inspiration to them that never failed to uplift them to greater thoughts and deeds, and how she always helped them to renew their faith in a better life.
Sybil was a writer. She wrote an online journal that brought her new friendships from all over the country. She wrote poems and short stories that were gifts to the world from her remarkable mind and heart. She was in the process of writing two fantasy novels, and a book titled ”The Gift of Cancer” when her life was cut short. If the world could somehow know what those books were going to contain, it would weep for what it has lost.
Sybil was always expanding her horizons. We gave her a microscope and she ran around collecting samples of water, slimes, molds, bugs, and everything else she could find. She would cry out in delight at the new world she could now enter through her extended sight. We gave her a digital camera and she took pictures wherever she went, showing us amazing things that we hadn’t really noticed before. She made her own soap, candles, and paper, wove cloth, did bead work, and sewed her own clothes. She loved to ride her bicycle, go kayaking, go for walks, do yoga and other mind-body workouts.
And, she bought books about it all. To her, books were doorways into other minds and other worlds. In addition to the non-fiction, she loved Fantasy and Science Fiction, but she was constantly pushing out into other genres, based on recommendations from friends and family.
While she was not a gamer per se, she loved the fantasy Role Playing Game Morrowind. She played it for hundreds of hours while her body was too sick to play out in the real world. She often credited Morrowind for ”getting her through it all.”
When she was in remission after her second round of cancer, she had the feeling that she had not done enough in her life. She bought a guitar, researched singing lessons, and proposed marriage to Brad Robertson, her lover of six years. While she was in the hospital for her third round of cancer, she often talked bout how strange and wonderful it was going to be when she was ”someone’s wife.”
Sybil and her family desire to thank the wonderful doctors, nurses, and staff at the hospitals that treated her. These incredible, dedicated people surrounded her with love, kindness, sensitive care, and a genuine concern for her comfort and well being that went beyond what we could ever hope for. There was Providence Hospital in Everett, including Dr. Cohenour and his staff, the Seattle Cancer Care Alliance SCCA, and finally there was the outstanding facility at the University of Washington Medical Center. We will always remember the entire staff on the 8th floor of that facility with the most heartfelt thanks, and we feel a deep gratitude for the dialysis nurses and technicians, and the amazing Intensive Care unit people that came to help Sybil. And, then there was the Outpatient nurses and staff who picked up all the pieces and worked with Sybil so she could spend a few weeks at home. She treasured those weeks. We are grateful.
Without exception, every single person that was involved in treating Sybil and there were dozens was a skilled professional and an excellent human being. These people get up every day and go out to battle a ruthless enemy that kills the young and old, the fathers and mothers, and the children of us all. We are proud to have met them.
Sybil is survived by: Robert and Virginia DeFord, her parents, Jason DeFord, her brother, and Brad Robertson, her fiancé.
Sybil was one of the first people I “met” when I joined Livejournal several years ago. We were very different kinds of people, and yet right away, I felt that we had a connection. But EVERYONE who read her journal felt connected with her, I suppose. She was so open and generous in her writing, and, it seemed, in everything she did, that you couldn’t help but feel connected to her. What a gift she had for making you feel like the only person in the world when her words were directed at you!
I missed Sybil so much during her treatments, when she didn’t write in her journal, that I began to write her letters. She always wrote back, always miraculously finding something wonderful to say when life could only have been anything but wonderful. I treasure those letters, with her loopy, spirited handwriting that looked just like I imagined her to be. I wish there were more to arrive in my mailbox.
I feel Sybil’s loss so keenly, I can’t imagine how terrible this must be for her family and close friends. I offer you all my deepest sympathies. I hope that the wonderful memories of Sybil’s too short but very meaningful life bring solace and peace in the years to come.
Sara
My sympathies to her family & close friends. She was always positive with other people and always willing to give a kind word. I will never forget her strength and determination. She will be greatly missed by many.
Sybil inspired me with her glow, with her enthusiasm for life. There will always be a piece of her in my heart.
You glow, girl.
My sympathy to her parents, brother, fiance and friends. I’m still stunned to know that she’s gone. She was a dear friend! I’ll miss her beautiful words, smile and laughter. She was here for too short a time. However, I know she’ll live on through everyone that she touched in that magical, creative and beautiful way.
Safe journey,
Susan MagicWoman – LJ
The ups and downs of the past few years highlighted Sybil’s courage and vitality and excitement–I always looked forward to hearing how she was doing and what she was working on, prayed for her constantly, and I read every word she wrote. She was a real inspiration; her words about her alternating attitudes of despair and exhiliration I will never forget. She was the Super Ninja Glow Girl. If I hardly knew her and it hurts this much, I can’t begin to express my condolences to her family and loved ones. May you find peace.
My condolences to the family of Sybil on behalf of the employees of the University of Washington Medical Center.
i am sad she is gone from earth- but happy i met her once in person when we both worked together as models for medical students as bastyr university. she was kind enough to give me a ride to my bus stop…she was a very talented writer and beautiful bright soul. her eyes had such spark in them. her journal touched me many times. i am happy her soul is now free of a body that was in pain and could not house her essence…
peace be with you sybil/fey and your whole family.
namaste & LoVe, shannon
I was quite taken back by Sybil’s passing. I remember Sybil as a compassionate student, and yes, a great writer!
My prayers and love are for Jason and the rest of the family. As at teacher, your family was always there for each other.
Sybil will be remembered as the young, energetic child in my heart. Sybil we all love YOU!
Mr. Sanden
I went to school with Sybil at Lakewood High School. I am very saddened by her passing. I have not seen Sybil since High School but knowing her specialness I can imagine that her time since has brought happiness to all she had contact with.
Dennis
To the Deford Family,
Our thoughts and prayers are with you and Sybil.
I was a teacher at Lakewood High when both Sybil and Jason went through school. Sybil was the kind of person that made teaching worthwhile. Her love of life and and kindness to students and teachers made the school a better place to be. I will miss her presence.
With the Greatest Respect,
Mike Evans
Retired teacher
Lakewood High School
I was very surprised to see that Sybil had passed. I graduated with sybil & she was always a friend to everybody. I haven’t seen her since highschool, but remember her spirit vividly. She will be missed.
I graduated with Sybil and though I haven’t seen her since she was a dear friend.
I regret not getting to see her before her passing but I know she is in a better place now and, more importantly, she is in no pain. She will be missed by all whose lives she touched.
Robert, Virginia and Jason, I am so sorry for your loss. Know you’ll be in my prayers.
Veronica Wallis Clayton
It is in times like these that I find any words I am able to bring forth feel utterly impotent. Sybil was many things to me, a teacher, muse, friend and most of all she was like a sister. She was always the sunshine that broke the clouds of my usual gloomy nature. I feel honored to have known her and her family since we met in the third grade, and will truly miss her.
Goodbye for now Sybil, but have no doubt we will meet again.
My prayers and condolences to the Deford family.
I remember Sybil from her various visits to Providence Everett Hospital, seventh floor. She was always bright and glowing-even on the hard days! She flew around the floor getting her exercise and had kind words for everyone. I am glad to have known her and I wish the family all the best. God bless you and may your memories sustain you in this difficult time.
I worked with Sybil at Cooper Electric. I was drawn to her vibrant energy and adored her infatuation for plants in the office, so much that I myself have surrounded myself with plants, even in my office, since then.
We emailed paragraphs of a story we made up, building on it. I still have these emails. I have often thought of her fondly, though we lost touch when we found other jobs. I remember when she made the phone call to Josh, who committed suicide. She had the love, compassion and courage to reach out to him. Though it was too late, I was so touched by the level of caring she had, that I grew in a large way as well. I find myself wishing I had kept in touch with her. What can I do now but learn from this? That is what Sybil would say.
I offer the deepest sympathy to her friends and family.
Sincerely,
Leyenda Eason
Our family has known Sybil since she was a teenager and, wacthed her grow into a wonderfull young lady. We will all miss her. The memory of Sybil will live on in the hearts of all of us.
-Camille Bonner
-Carly Bonner
-Richard Bonner
-Melissa Bonner
I am deeply sorry for your loss. I graduated from High School with Sybil in 1991. She touched peoples lives then, I can only imagine how she touched peoples lives now. She will always be remembered in our hearts.
I really can’t believe she is gone. My heart is broken to hear that such a truly awesome person is gone from this world. I worked with Sybil and came to know her as a true friend, one who I could always count on to be optimistic and upbeat. She was my best friend and the world will not ever be the same without her. My heart goes out to Brad and her parents, please know that you all shared with us a gift that will always be reflected in how we live our lives. God Bless.
Thank you all for your support! It has helped us all get through this difficult hurdle of our lives. Mr. Evans, the hurdle metaphor brings you to mind for some reason. Mr. Sanden, Sybil and I often shared stories of being in your class with fondness. To both of you, thanks for helping mold her young mind as you’ve done for so many others, great teachers and youth leaders like yourselves never get their due credit. Gene, she spoke of you often, and I’m glad she had friends like you to have good times with. To all those who would like a more intimate knowledge of the amazing person Sybil has become, check out her journal entries at livejournal.com and do a search of the username “fey”, then click on the underlined “fey” towards the top of the page
I have known Sybil since early in the 7th Grade @ Lakewood H.S. We have been so close over the years, that we considered ourselves soul sisters. She was always an inspiration to me in everything. She helped me through so many difficult times in my marriage and being a mother. She was my eye-opener and a great teacher about many things in life. I came to know and share her faith well, and as a fellow mystic/pagan, I am comforted by the thought of what she is experiencing now. I understand that we need to all let her go, so she can be free, but I just cannot find the strength to do it. I havent even had the strength to write in my journal since her passing. Her illness was horrible and she handled it with wonderful grace and spirit. Never once did she doubt. Yes, even she experienced anger at her situation, but she overcame it and simply accepted her fate. I will always miss her, a piece of me went with her. I have never felt so alone. Please spend every day to its fullest, and waste no time that you are given. Always appreciate those you love, and every special and ordinary moment. I love you Sybil, and fully expect to see you again, in the next adventure. Your sister- past, present, and future. Roni
I met Sybil when we both went to North Seattle Community College together.I use to see her with another person that I knew in one of the smoking areas and we would all just chat. We became friends and she was always fun and good to talk to. I loved the spiritual side to her. There was a sense of peace about her that came from this and I admired it and wished I could be that fortunate. Though over the past years we’ve only been able to keep in touch via e-mail and I have saved the e-mails that she has sent, even through her first diagnosis w/ cancer she STILL had this sense o f peace and resolve. I will always keep her in my heart and think of her peace and strength that she exhibited through it all. My condolences go out to her family, fiance, and friends.
Alberto
I met Sybil when she was in an Everett Community College production of “Dark of the Moon” I choreograhed the dance scenes and she was so much fun to work with.
Sybil & my daughter Christine were both in this play and they remained great friends forever. I also remember when Sybil would come over to the house to pick up my daughter she always took the time to sit down and visit. She was such a remarkable girl. She will be so deeply missed by everyone she knew and touched.
My heart goes out to her family. There won’t be another Sybil she was truely a one of a kind.
Dear Mr. and Mrs. DeFord,
It was with great sadness that learned of Sybil’s loss in the battle against cancer.
I always remember her with such fondness and have thought of her ocassionally through the years. She was always suppose to be my
“movie star” student. I was so sure even in fifth gradethat she could have made it big in acting.
Your letter describes her nature beautifully and her picture reflects her soul perfectly.
I am going to include a copy of your letter in my retirement scrapbook of class pictures. I was blessed to have known her and enjoyed her infectious sense of humor.
My thoughts are with you and Jason.
Sincerely,
Dorothy Bolton
Dear Mr. and Mrs. DeFord,
I feel like I met sybal, through roni and tom Mcdonald.
to me she sounds like she was a very carefree spirited Gal who always did things that made her happy, things that she could/can grow and learn from. In my heart I believe Sybil, did everything the best she knew and let it grow so she become stronger and stronger. I believe that she lived and shined with a smile and loved to share things with others so they could be as proud as possible. I believe that sybil and roni had the friendship we always look for.
God Bless You Sybil<>< May you feel carefree of pain now and always know that you will be cared for and loved. God Bless Your family, May you all be in peace, and meet agian ,soon. Annette
Sybil touched my life through Live Journal. She was and still is an inspiration.
The DeFord family,
I met Sybil through livejournal. She was one of the first people I ‘met’.
She was a brilliant, amazing woman. Talented writer, spiritual, and positive through everything. Even though we had never met, she had an influence on my life. She made me want to be a better person.
You have my deepest condolences. Perhaps we can all share a smile in Sybil’s memory – I think it’s what she would have wanted.
I met Sybil nearly 15 years ago, while acting in a play ‘Dark of the Moon’ through Everett Community College’s theatre department. We became fast friends, and remained close throughout the years. We’ve shared many laughs, tears, and cups of coffee together.
She was a genuine friend, with a heart of gold; one who was always there to offer her support, wisdom, insight, and a shoulder to cry on. I am so ever grateful that I had known Sybil, her spirit will always be with me. She will be missed dearly.
I just learned of the passing of Sybil and I still can hardly believe. I hadn’t talked to Sybil in years but I thought of her often.
I met Sybil when I was a Junior at Lakewood and she was a Freshman. She was the only person to come up and talk to me. She had wonderful energy and I liked her from the moment I saw her. She was one of a kind.
We shared many good times and I am so sorry that I did not keep in touch with her. I know you’re around Sybil. I want you to know that I love you and you have impacted my life in so many ways. Until we meet again my Party down Buddy. Love, Lisa
Oh Sybil- I will miss you deeply. My heart hurts for your family and Brad who will be without you now. I’ve thought about you quite often for a few years now, trying to see if I could get a hold of you to catch up. I recently found out about your passing. I’m in shock that you are gone…but God must have had bigger and better things for you and called you home.
I was friends with Sybil from at least 7th grade at Lakewood; we had lost touch over the last few years, I wasnt even aware she was ill until today. I will miss you terribly, sweetie, but I know you are with the goddess now.
Anyone whoever met her knows Sybil was a true force of nature in her own right. I was lucky enough to meet her through a mutual friend early on in our teen years and instantly felt a connection. Because she was the free spirit that she was, Sybil would flit in and out of our lives. Sometimes for weeks, sometimes months…. but she would always be back just as I would wonder “Hmmmmm. I wonder where Sybil is?” Here she would come, and it would be as though no time had passed….. I’m VERY sorry to say this last time she flitted away was for a few years…. and then forever. Months after the fact I have discovered that I have lost my wild little friend….. Again fate stepped in. In the past few weeks for whatever reason I have thought long and hard about her…. and then I was given the news…..disbelief was my first thought…What a cosmic joke. How can anyone so fierce of spirt be gone? But knowing Sybil for the brief time I was honored with taught me one thing…. she will NEVER be gone. She is, was, and will always be a little sprite upon my shoulder laughing in my ear. My dearest friend, farewell…. Love Jennifer
We hadn’t seen Sybil for a long time, but she was always a wonderful and happy memory of our daughter Erin’s life at Lakewood Junior High. Sybil’s friendship for Erin was one of the highlights of her life before we moved to Marysville, and they didn’t get to see as much of each other. Still though, every once in a while she would show up on our doorstep, and it was as though no time had passed at all since the last time. She was a giving, happy soul who left us too soon, but God must have important plans for her, or he wouldn’t have taken her away from everyone who loves her and misses her today. My deepest sympathy goes out to the DeFord family for their terrible loss.
Sincerely,
Maureen Utz
I didn’t know Sybil, but my LiveJournal friend, Susan, aka “Magicwoman” mentioned her today, on the anniversary of her death, and I went to her journal and read her words, her hopes, and felt the vibrant and caring woman she was. In 2000 I had cancer surgery which got all of the disease, as we caught it early and there was nothing in the lymph nodes. I’ve made it to my fifth year of remission, and I’m so grateful for the blessing of being healed. I wish this had happened for Sybil, but I remember her now in my heart and always will. Her words still resonate within me. She was a very special woman and I consider myself lucky to have gotten to know her even at this late date. In a way, she will always be with us through her journal. Love to you all,
-Annina